Home
Groundhog's Day Pie Anyone?
By James Geneau
How much woodchuck could you eat, if a woodchuck could be served with lima beans and a nice bottle of Chianti? OK, it may not be the tongue-twister we all know but with tomorrow being Groundhog’s Day, I thought I would give it a try. It has been a relatively mild winter thus far and tomorrow, the world will wait for Punxsutawney Phil in the USA or our own beloved Wiarton Willie here in Canada to make their predictions. Will it be a cold and long winter or will spring come early? Oh, how we love the useless predictions of these precious little “land-beavers”.
Always hungry and ready to grill I had to wonder…can one eat a groundhog? What does it taste like? Where would one procure such a meat? The only real source these days for such answers is Google. I typed in the words “Recipes for Groundhog” and to my delight, an informative site called Wildliferecipes.net provided some options. Now that I had options, the question was what should I choose for dinner if I happened to catch myself a Groundhog or Woodchuck?
The recipe for Woodchuck Patties suggested that I remove the meat from the bones and grind them. I could then add bread crumbs, onion, salt, pepper, egg, and fat; mix thoroughly, and form into patties. These would then be dipped into egg, then dip in bread crumbs, and fried. I could even cook them afterwards in a tomato sauce. Nice, but I love more of a challenge.
Woodchuck Stew was another option on the site and was a bit more complex. The same process of removing the meat was involved then soaking in parts of vinegar and water – I guess to tenderize. The next day I could combine with onions, celery, cloves , salt and pepper. Again, a hearty meal in celebration of Groundhog’s Day but not something I would want to serve at my celebratory dinner soiree. Not to be a snob, but stew isn’t exactly something one serves at a candlelight supper with a fine bottle of 90s California Chardonnay.
I then realized that if I truly wanted to celebrate the holiday (like Christmas or Easter), then perhaps a Woodchuck Pie would work – given how it could be easily used to replace a traditional Christmas Eve dinner of Tortiere – as in our household. This recipe called for cutting the woodchuck into 2 or 3 pieces and then parboiling for 1 hour. Once removed from the heat, I could separate the meat from the bones and add onion, green pepper, parsley, salt, pepper, and flour to the broth and stir until it thickened. I could then pour it into my pie crust, cover, and bake. OK – less of a Tortiere and more of a pot-pie but the addition of some decorative lacing and pastry flowers could turn this rodent into the most refined of delicacies…no? Maybe with a nice salad or roasted vegetables? It was settled, this was the best option.
Procuring a Groundhog unfortunately, was a bigger task. I did try calling a few butchers in Toronto and alas, no Woodchuck or Groundhog. I did find one shop offering frozen Groundhog cutlets but they were farmed and not organic. I am a big supporter of responsible eating and refused to support the industrial groundhog meat industry – as you should be as well. Since no sustainable, ethically raised, and organic groundhog was available; I called my friends and cancelled the soiree. It was the first time I have ever done such a thing and I could tell by their tone on the phone that they were thoroughly disappointed with not being able to enjoy my Woodchuck Pie.
And so, I am going to give it one last effort tomorrow morning. The alarm is set for 4:00am when I will hop in the car and head out to Wiarton to meet Willie. Fair warning good folks of Wiarton, if that little asshole runs back into his hole and dooms us for 5 more weeks of winter, I am going after him, butcher knife in hand.
Comments